Friday, July 31, 2009


A criminal lawyer I know cited a case to persuade a judge to try his client separately from the other defendants - of course this is done all the time but the interesting thing about the case that he used was that it was a Federal case and it was the Timothy McVeigh case. Now that's a tough row to hoe.

I'm presently reading the "Eichmann Interrogations" - his statements to the Israeli police. At first I'm thinking - wow - this guy's a great witness - he's actually got a defense - he didn't know what was going on. According to him all he did was follow orders and arrange "transportation". But then all that stuff about him visiting the death camps and even making recommendations on how to improve the killing process comes out and - well - it starts looking like not such a good case after all.

Osama hasn't come to trial yet (if he ever does) so you can't know - but I know one thing - that's going to be a tough case to try. That much I know.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Pre Need Legal Services

I’ve been thinking about ways to increase my business which is lousy. I came up with PRE-NEED LEGAL SERVICES. This is for the common citizen. Of course the Mafia and Big Business & Big Government have always had these services but what about people like me and you?
It’s like PRE-NEED burial plots.
I’m not talking about PREPAID Legal Insurance, like Medical Insurance, where you pay for legal services that you may or may not need.
No, PRE-NEED is – if you’re thinking about committing a crime - talk to a lawyer about it first.*
I could advise you (based on my daily experiences of seeing people after they're arrested in criminal courts) of what you need to worry about in order to:
1. Avoid being caught. For instance, (and this is only one example) don't brag about the crime to your friends or associates. Seems basic but you'd be surprised at the percentage of persons who can't seem to keep their mouth shut and end up shackled in court.
2. Avoid being convicted, if caught. Like, don’t take off your disguise when you rob a STORE as you get closer to the register and the camera. Again, you'd be surprised at how many robbers do.
3. Minimize your time in prison if you are caught and convicted. Right off the bat (no pun intended) you should know whatever the crime, you're a lot better off using anything but a gun. That's because there are all these wacky laws about the use of guns in crimes which increase the time you'll go away for like crazy. I'm talking the "L" word - "Life". DON’T USE A GUN - not worth it. There are other weapons available including the aforementioned "bat".
Just thinking.

*obviously they'll have to change the law & all those ethical rules about not being allowed to counsel a future crime but these are tough economic times; lawyers are losing their jobs left & right.

Thursday, July 9, 2009


Attorney are always "conducting discovery". First time I heard this term I thought wow, this is deep - a secret rite.
Now I know it's just the DA giving you the police report. So much for mystery.

Friday, July 3, 2009


The solution to the whole budget thing occurred to me the other day when a judge was sentencing two of my clients - one right after the other - after they accepted the DA's "offer" of 4 years in State Prison in return for their guilty pleas. The judge while pronouncing "judgment" orders them, in addition to the state prison time to pay "restitution", "court costs", "fees", even something called a "Conviction Assessment Fee". These all were pursuant to Government Code something and Government Code something else and Penal Codes something else. Judges do this all the time routinely and it's something they're probably required to do pursuant to Government Codes something something. And it takes a long time for judges to say all of it. Probably didn't add up to more than $500.00.
I love these "fees" and "costs" and "assessments" especially when the defendant is going to prison for something like 450 years to life. Some judges actually seem to want to slam them with all this stuff like "yeah and take this too!".
I'm thinking the State Legislature should increase all these "fees", "costs" and "assessments" to really cover the costs - like for how much it actually costs California, not only for the courts but the prisons too. Assess these convicted felons the several millions it costs to house them in prison if they're 20 years old and sent to spend the next 450 years plus in custody. Not that they're any more likely to pay that any more than they pay the smaller amount usually ordered. But then California can balance the budget cause wouldn't these thing all this money owed be Assets that the State is owed? We'd be way ahead. That's the solution. Just thinking.